I like to take Stella to mother goose on the loose. It is at the public library's in my area where babies and toddlers listen and interact by saying and doing hand motions to nursery rhymes. Sounds cute right? Well not if your Stella. I keep trying to take her thinking she will eventually enjoy but I give up! I look at every other kids in there smiling and giggling with their mommies, but nooooooo, not Stella. If I sing one word she starts screeching and whining like I just did the most awful thing ever, cute huh? We went this morning and after her first little outburst I took her outside to discipline her, rather than causing a scene. Then we go back in to try it again. I give up trying to participate with her and sit there quietly. But when its time to turn in their scarves Stella is not having it. Every other kid is walking up to the librarian turning in their scarves but when I tell Stella its time to turn in her scarf she starts yelling and throwing things. Not because she wants the scarf but because I told her what to do.
Its days like this when I don't even like my own kid! Don't judge me, I heard you gasp. I get over it quickly but not without a few tears myself. It doesn't happen often but I hate feeling that way. I don't think my pregnancy hormones are helping because today we both left the library in tears. I can't even sing to the radio in the car without her getting mad! I'm not trying to annoy her I promise! It feels like we've just skipped straight to the teenage years where mom can't do anything right. It is exhausting.
My mom tells me Stella thinks she "rules the roost", but she is in for a rude awakening! I am reclaiming my roost and if I want to sing 'Grease lightening' or 'Summer lovin' then I am darn sure gonna do it! Stella, my love, you are not the boss of me. You're not, you're not, you're not!!!