Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Bittersweet

It surprises me every so often when I look at Stella and realize I love her more than the day before. I thought my heart was full and I couldn't possibly love her anymore, yet I do. I am occasionally overwhelmed by the feelings you get once you become a mother. This new expansion of my heart is not always happy though, It can feel very sad too. This morning Mike informed me that the little girl gone missing in Tracy, CA. was found dead. Sandra Cantu was only 8 years old and her life was ended in a horrible way. This news left me sickened and even though I do not know this girl or her family I shed tears for them. It is because I am a mother that I feel the sadness so strongly; my heart has changed. Even though this change has brought a stronger sense of sadness along with the joy, I accept it gratefully. I guess you don't get the joy without a little bit of pain. That is kind of what motherhood is all about.

God Bless Sandra and her family.

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